transformers

By now, everyone knows how the Academy Awards tend to ignore science fiction films, relegating them to the technical prizes, so I won't bore you with that diatribe today. By now, everyone also knows that James Cameron's massively successful Avatar managed to beat the odds and squeeze out a bunch of nominations including Best Picture and Best Director, flying in the face of this trend and promising new hope for the genre at awards season.

By now, everyone knows that Avatar got squashed at the Oscars by Kathryn Bigelow's The Hurt Locker. Then again, so did everyone else. I was giving the superb Iraq War drama the edge to squeak out Best Picture and Director myself, but six wins is, by the definition I created for it in my head, a sweep.

However, this will be remembered as the year that science fiction made a big showing at the mother of all major media awards ceremonies. In addition to its many nominations, Avatar went home with Best Visual Effects, Best Cinematography and Best Art Direction, the first an absolute no-brainer, the second a head-scratching affirmation that 3D motion capture is somehow equivalent to real camerawork and the third richly deserved, but the guy who pointed to James Cameron in the audience and said "This Oscar sees you" is never going to live that down. Ever.

Sometimes, this whole "movie news" thing is just depressing. For every thing I post about Alfonso Cuaron making an amazing sounding science fiction film with Angelina Jolie, I have another piece about popular non-entity Taylor Lautner making the big decision that one movie based on a lame toy line is more worthy of his time than another.

Yes folks, Taylor Lautner has dropped out of Max Steel so he can concentrate on Stretch Armstrong.

There's got to be a hilarious Hollywood satire at the center of all of this. Paramount and Mattel face off against Universal and Hasbro, both trying to recruit the super-hot but dreadfully boring star of the moment to play second tier characters based on toys that no one has cared about in ages. Quick! Find me a Necronomicon and let's resurrect Robert Altman to make a pseudo-sequel to The Player! Or we can just get Armando Iannucci, if that's cheaper.

I remember commercials for Max Steel and Stretch Armstrong toys when I was but a wee lad, but even at an age where bad taste is a way of life, I knew Max Steel was a pretty big bag of lame and that the actual playability of a Stretch Armstrong was limited. The fact that they are even considering making a movie about either of these properties is mind-boggling to me. At least GI Joe and Transformers were brands with longevity. Do they even make either of these toys anymore?

The very thought of Taylor "My Abs Are As Rock Hard As My Unmoving And Boring Face" Lautner playing the lead in a movie about a guy who can stretch real good makes me want to drain a bottle of vodka and cry myself to sleep in the closet. It truly feels like the bottom of the barrel. It makes me depressed to be a movie fan.

(Via The Vulture)

Looking for something good and geeky to watch? Check out this week's notable sci-fi DVD and Blu-ray releases:

Moon (DVD and Blu-ray)
Leading man Sam Rockwell and director Duncan Jones lit up the festival circuit with this smart, satisfying and suspenseful film about a lonely man who encounters a most unusual problem while working on the moon. I don't want to give anything away for those who haven't seen it. I'll just say that Moon is a must-see for sci-fi fans who care about character, ideas and plot and less about showy special effects and gadgetry. The DVD features a short film by Jones, plus commentary from the director and producer Stuart Fenegan.

Ghost in the Shell 2.0 (DVD)
Director Mamoru Oshii revamps his groundbreaking and influential 1995 anime with more sophisticated CGI and a brand new soundtrack. Fan reaction was mixed when GIT 2.0 was released in Japan and in the UK. Most GIT devotees dubbed it an interesting but ultimately inessential update.

Transformers: Season 2, Volume 2, 25th Anniversary Edition (DVD)
For those who couldn't pony up for the Matrix of Leadership full series set, Hasbro is releasing the 25th anniversary editions of the classic "G1" series in parts. (Now you can assemble 'em like you did with Devastator when you were a kid.) The second volume of season two features the fan-favorite "Vector Sigma" saga that gave us the Stunticons and the Aerialbots.

I think Bryan Singer is a first-class talent. When he's at his best, he'll pump out a great film like The Usual Suspects or X2, and when he's at his worst, he still manages to make an interesting failure like Superman Returns. I like him. I like his movies. I want to look forward to future Bryan Singer motion pictures.

Bryan Singer...please don't make X-Men Origins: First Class.

CHUD has all of the info tied up into a nice little package, including video from yesterday's Avatar premiere where Singer let this slip (although it looks like the news may have initially hit the internet via Twitter). Singer's name has been floating around next to this one for awhile now, but considering the borderline violent way Fox reacted to his wanting to direct Superman before a third X-Men film (which culminated in that whole Brett Ratner fiasco), it always felt, well, wrong. Now we have confirmation from the man himself.

Let me repeat myself: Bryan Singer...please don't make X-Men Origins: First Class.

Looking for something good and geeky to watch? Here are this week's notable DVD and Blu-ray releases:

Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen (DVD & Blu-ray)
There's little left to say that hasn't been said already about Michael Bay's crude, stupid, bloated, spirit-crushing monster of a Transformers sequel, so I'll let Roger Ebert, who best described the experience of watching this movie, take it from here: "If you want to save yourself the ticket price, go into the kitchen, cue up a male choir singing the music of hell, and get a kid to start banging pots and pans together. Then close your eyes and use your imagination."

Those who enjoy this brand of cinematic punishment should know the 2-disc DVD and the Blu-ray versions are loaded with special features, including commentary by Bay and writers Roberto Orci and Alex Kurtzman, and too many mini docs and featurettes to list.

Blood: The Last Vampire (DVD & Blu-ray)
This gory remake of the Japanese anime opened to generally poor reviews earlier this year. Still, watching a cute half human-half vampire chick hacking and slashing evil bloodsuckers to death sounds like a good way to kill a few hours.

Yes, it's a long way from the far reaches of outer space to Bora Bora, but you just know that if you managed to get away with your girlfriend for a few days of rest and relaxation, something's going to screw it up. That's what happens to four romantic pairs in Couples Retreat, which was filmed in Bora Bora and opens tomorrow. In the movie, the couples think they'll be able to enjoy of fun and sun in Bora Bora, but instead are forced to undergo couples counseling.

None of the therapists quite rises up to the level of "villain" -- though Jean Reno comes close -- but, as a science fiction fan, I thought it would fun to imagine the sci-fi villains you'd least like to see on an island retreat. It would be impossible to get romantic with these guys around.

1. Jabba the Hut

Talk about a buzz kill! You don't want to head down to the dining room and see this monstrosity sitting next to your table. First, he's make you lose your appetite. Which is a good thing, since he'd eat all the food on the island anyway. Of course, your girlfriend would probably already be wearing a bikini like Princess Leia's in Star Wars Episode VI: Return of the Jedi, but she wouldn't take kindly to enforced slavery. And he'd force you to compete in a real-life battle to the death, which is no way to enjoy your holiday. The only plus: he'd probably eat all the insects in your vicinity.

While you may have had fun spending a little over two hours playing inside Michael Bay's fictional universe from Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen this past summer, I bet you didn't know that folks have been busy creative real-life Transformers that aren't of the toy variety. Takeshi Maeda has debuted the OmniZero.9 (see above), which is "a second-generation car transformer with shoulder and knee mounted wheels that allow its creator to ride along, once transformed," according to the Techeblog. The Transformer (which looks pretty badass if you ask me) recently competed at ROBO-ONE where it was captured on video transforming and fighting a smaller robot that was no match for OmniZero.9.

I can't be the only one who's a little freaked out by this, because when these guys finally decide to turn on us and invade earth, Optimus Prime and Bumblebee won't be there to protect us. Nope, we'll just have to settle for Shia LaBeouf and Megan Fox -- both of whom will probably ditch everyone else and retreat to their hidden Hollywood bunkers. Oh well. Go technology!

Watch the real-life Transformer in action after the jump ...

Like Peter Cullen, the actor who provides the voice for his on screen adversary, Optimus Prime, Frank Welker is a bona fide icon of the voice recording world. Not just because he has more than four decades of work and 600 individual credits to his name. Not just because yes, he provided the voice for Megatron, one of the most famous villains in cartoon history. Rather, it's because people know and identify him just from his voice, which may run contrary to the idea of actors disappearing into their roles, but it demonstrates that what he does is so distinctive and special it transcends the limitations of the medium.

SciFi Squad recently caught up with Welker via email to discuss his illustrious history in voice recording, in conjunction with Shout! Factory's Sept. 15 DVD release of Transformers Season Two, Volume One. In addition to talking about bringing Megatron to life, he talks about the technical and creative challenges of voice work, and reflects on a few of the roles that linger in the memories of movie and TV fans long after the characters left the screen.

SciFi Squad: I'll start with the obvious first: How did you get into voice acting, and by the time you performed on Transformers, was your work as Megatron initially just another job or was the process of getting the role distinctive in your career?

Ready to show your obedience to your own personal robot overlords? Or maybe you need something to wear to Comic-Con or that Big Bang Theory audition. Don't sweat it. HideYourArms has you covered. The T-shirt blog is celebrating Transformers 2's recent pummeling of international cinema with a look at 101 robot T-shirts. The list isn't extensive, it's mind blowing! With photos and links to online retailers, it's your one stop shop for nerdy urban street wear.

Check out five of my favorite robo tees from the list after the jump.

Welcome to Captain's Log -- your (semi) daily round-up of sci-fi randomness from around the web. Here's what's happening today:

- AICN has a list of the added/reworked scenes from Zack Snyder's Watchmen Director's Cut. It features a lot more dialogue and violence than the theatrical version. Surprise!

- Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosarus earned $13.8 million Wednesday, taking the top box office spot from Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen. Maybe next time Michael Bay will deliver the Dinobots instead of close-ups of John Turturro's ass and giant Decepticon balls.

- You know the Beyond Thunderdome-esque get-up Mickey Rourke is wearing in that Iron Man 2 set photo? Turns out that's probably only for an early scene. Rourke will be outfitted in more imposing Crimson Dynamo/Whiplash armor later on in the movie.

More sci-fi awesomeness after the jump.